We’ve spent a lot of time here talking about self care and how to balance your time. This is all super important no matter where you work but what happens when the company culture has no respect for your time and what you need. I recently read a tweet from someone that said at their company’s end of year meeting they discussed the results of a survey that said the staff feels over worked and under paid. The CEO suggested all the staff get a gratitude journal and appreciate their coworkers more. (You can read the tweet here: https://twitter.com/MIZ_JJC/status/1212074629432532992) We can make jokes about executives being out of touch with their companies, and we probably should just to help us get through the day, but this is a real thing said by a large company that employs thousands of people. Even if those people do everything right, they are set up to fail. When the top line says that staff is responsible for their own mental health and the company not only refuses to make policies that allow for that but actively works against them what can you do?
Unfortunately, there is very little you can do to change the culture in the company or industry you’re in. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try, fill out the surveys, talk about it during your review, hell call out the CEO in the end of year meeting, or in a tweet! You may get somewhere, even small changes can help in situations like this but, especially in a big corporation, you’re unlikely to make any big changes. If you do manage to make them, it will take a lot of time. Corporations move slowly. That’s OK though, there are some things you can do for yourself.
First, get good at setting boundaries. I know not all industries allow this (I’m thinking young lawyer trying to make partner or a resident in a hospital) and I think especially in the earlier years of your career it’s normal to make some exceptions that you wouldn’t after you’ve proven yourself. You should still have boundaries but they might be a little further down the road than they would be for someone whose established themselves already. With the caveat out of the way, we can talk about good boundary setting. For example, you’re a salaried employee who is getting pressured to work 80 hours a week. It’s likely your contract states something about the hours you’re expected to work and it’s very unlikely that the expected hours are 80. Dig up your contract and read it. Bring it to your boss and explain that you can no longer work the hours they are demanding and you want to find a solution with them. It is possible they’ll throw down and fire you, but probably not. Especially if you have a clause in your contract. Even if not though, going to your boss and explaining that this is not sustainable and you need to come to a solution is unlikely to just get you the boot. It may not make lasting changes but hopefully it can give you some relief until you have to have the conversation again.
Remember that when you’re off you’re off. Very few jobs actually require us to be available 24/7. If you took the day off, make sure everyone has what they need if there are time sensitive things that need to be done, and then be off. Leave your phone in another room if you have to. Uninstall your email app for the day. Do what you need to but take that time. Even half a day of being off and “unplugged” can be a huge recharge when you’ve been “on” for weeks. Don’t apologize for it either. You were not working. There’s no reason to apologize for taking a day to get back to someone. This can be tricky especially if you do have the kind of job where you might need to be on call. Maybe an IT administrator or someone who is the only person in your company that can do the thing. When I really need a break but feel like I can’t disconnect because there’s something I’m worried about (maybe a new manager or difficult client), I give my phone to a friend I’m spending time with and ask them to tell me if there’s an emergency. It gives me the space to know that everything is being monitored but not have to check it constantly. I’ve gotten better at this and don’t need the friend very often but it can be a good way to retrain yourself. Unfortunately we often don’t really have an emergencies only way to contact so this can be a good stop gap.
Finally, you can consider looking for other work. If your whole industry is like this, it might not matter. Even if it is though, starting a new position where you can set boundaries from the get go might make a big difference. If you’ve been working in the same place since you’re early 20s and you’re in your early 30s now, people might still be seeing and treating you as the 23 year old fresh out of college. Even if you’ve gotten the promotion it can be hard to make that transition in people’s minds. If you’ve tried the above suggestions and have gotten nowhere, maybe even gone backwards, it might be time to look for a fresh start. When you make the switch, make a plan to set boundaries early. They hired you because they like you, make sure they keep you because you’re taking care of yourself.
Working in an company or industry like this is like waking up every morning and rolling with disadvantage. It sucks and can feel like there’s no way out or through. Making some small changes can make a real difference though. What have you done to change the game where you work?