Forgive Yourself

Sometimes when I sit down to write one of these posts, I’m not always sure where it’s going to go. I start out with an idea or a framework and I usually try to stick to the plan. It can go awry and then I usually end up with two posts, one of which I did not see coming. Sometimes I don’t know what I’m going to write about but it’s getting down to the wire and I better pick something! Today was one of the latter situations so I’m going to write what I wish someone would tell me. I think in most cases that if we listened to our own advice we’d be in better shape but we are our worst critics and put up with much less from ourselves than we do from anyone else. My best advice today is to give myself (and yourself) a damn break. I have been working my butt off with moving, unpacking, business growth, a new puppy, all of it and I am just tired. I got some work done this morning and for the first time in weeks found myself with unscheduled time. You know what? I watched ER on Hulu and snuggled my pup. It. Was. Great.

I often don’t realize that I’m going too hard until it’s too late. It’s easy for me to get overwhelmed with work and life and fun and I come up for air to find that 3 weeks have passed and I haven’t had a night to myself or any down time to speak of since then. In some ways I thrive on activity and connection but everyone needs a break sometimes and I usually figure it out in the middle of an absurdly busy phase with no real end in sight. Yet somehow, even though I KNOW I need a break, when a night comes up where I could rest, I plan something else for myself. I say yes to something I don’t even want to do. I’ll tell myself I HAVE to work out because it’s been so long and I know it’ll make me feel better. And it might but I also might need to just rest. So here I am reminding you (but mostly myself) to forgive ourselves for not getting absolutely everything done. Take care of yourself. It’s OK to sometimes skip a networking event to go to the gym or sit at home on your butt. We’ve talked about self care a lot and we’ve talked about how it’s important to schedule it in and prioritize it but it’s also OK if the self care you planned needs to change. It’s OK if you just can’t do it anymore.

When I am on my game, I ask myself what will make me feel best. I find myself with a free evening, do I go to that dance class I like? Do I plan a happy hour with a few friends? Maybe invite one friend over for some company on the couch? Or maybe, I do nothing. I let myself stop thinking and planning and checking things off my list. What will make me feel BEST when I put myself to bed that night. The reality of being a business owner, and frankly, an adult is that there is never a time when you’re done. There is always something else, more yard work, more cleaning, more organizing, more planning, paperwork, more more more. If anyone ever gets every single thing checked off their list, let me know because I’d like to read your blog! If you find yourself at a stopping point and that next thing looks as daunting as building The Great Wall, put your to do list away and give yourself a beat. The world will keep turning and you will be able to contribute more meaningfully after you’ve recharged your batteries.

As always thanks for reading! Stay tuned next week for some tips and tricks to master your to do list. Or maybe, if you’re like me a month ago, start using them!